Jenny Hodges as read by Fancy Buttons

Jenny Hodges as read by Fancy Buttons

As it’s Halloween, I thought I’d do you a creepy poem. Then I thought I’d get Mr Fancy Buttons to record it. Then I thought I’d better put it all on the website along with the creepy illustration at the top of the page. So here it is: Jenny...
And then it all went wrong

And then it all went wrong

I thought I should maybe probably write a little post to cover my tracks. You’ve probably noticed that after only a few weeks of the poetry challenge, I gave up. Well, there’s a good reason for that, I gave up cos I’m shit. You see, my plan was to...
Week 5 – My Cat’s A Wanker

Week 5 – My Cat’s A Wanker

Well this poetry thing isn’t going well at all. I’m a week behind and only coming up with partial works. Still, I might as well post what I’ve done, if for no other reason than to show that I’ve not just given up. So here’s this...
Week 4 – D’ya Wanna?

Week 4 – D’ya Wanna?

This week’s theme was, an invitation. It could be any kind of invitation and at first I thought I’d do one called, Come to the Orgy. I got as far as Come to the orgy We can have such fun You can take me in the kitchen And I’ll do you up the…....
52 – Week 3 – This Is Me

52 – Week 3 – This Is Me

This weeks theme is my exposed body. I suspect this was meant to be an attempt at getting me to write an honest (brutally so) poem that left me exposed as a “good” poet should. However, since I tend to write in character I had a lot of trouble getting into...
52 – Week 2 – Doing My Exercise

52 – Week 2 – Doing My Exercise

Doing my exercise I’ve been running  about round the park like a twat And it’s too bloody cold and I’m too bloody fat I’ve forgotten my gloves and I ain’t got an ‘at And the shorts that I’m in make me look like a prat There are dogs on those leads that are too bloody...
52 – Week 1

52 – Week 1

As part of my brilliant plan to be more creative this year, I wanted to do more poetry. So I got this book called, 52 by Jo Bell, which provides a different prompt for each week. You also get a little discussion and one or two example poems on that weeks theme. So...
Bury Me in the Potter’s Field

Bury Me in the Potter’s Field

This poem was written some time ago and I totally forgot to post it here. It got over 340 views on Hello Poetry and was a trending poem for 1 day which will most likely be the highlight of my career 😀 Bury me in the potter’s field But please make sure I’m...
I’m Sexy and a Poet

I’m Sexy and a Poet

We didn’t do poetry at school, as far as I can remember, although we may have skirted it on occasion. But mostly, thanks to the set system, I was one of those deemed not clever enough to bother teaching poetry to. So it passed me by. It was the Channel 4 show, 8...